All posts by O. J. Toks

About O. J. Toks

O. J. Toks is a husband, son, brother, minister, speaker, Christian Inspirational Hip Hop Artist, Producer and author of Rejected for a Purpose: How God Uses Rejection to Help You Find and Fulfill Your Destiny. He has written for Essence Magazine, been a guest on 89.3 KSBJ, and is the president and founder of O. J. Toks Ministries, which presents While You Are Single: a service and podcast for singles. He loves to play soccer, listen and dance to music, and watch movies. His mission is to inform and inspire people to find and fulfill God's purpose in every aspect of their lives.

Beneath the Surface

A few years ago a friend and coworker of mine asked me to check out a video. The video was about a wild boar that was bracing to defend itself against a pack of wild dogs. The boar was at the edge of a river, drinking water. The pack of wild dogs, about eleven of them where waiting for it to come out from the edge of the river. The scene was like an old school western. I could have sworn that I heard the soundtrack of The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly playing in the background. The difference though, was that no good came out of this situation. It was all bad and ugly.

While the boar drank water it simultaneously watched the wild dogs. They were staring each other down. While watching this scene play out for a few minutes, my friend nudged me to look more closely at what was happening. That’s when I saw it. I gasped. I didn’t even notice it. While the hog was busy and probably freaking out sizing up his would-be assailants, a crocodile had crept up just a few inches beside it. I’ve heard about being between a rock and a hard place, but never between a pack of wild dogs and a crocodile.

The boar took a few steps forward to sip some more water, and that was its last movement before its life was snuffed out in seconds. Like a snake, the reptile leaped out of the water, seized the boar’s neck between its jaws, and dragged it down below the surface of the water. The attack happened so fast that if you were watching the boar and the wild dogs prior to the assault, and then turned away for a few seconds and then turned back, you wouldn’t have known anything happened, except for the dwindling ripples of water.

We are like the wild boar; not because we’re wild or overweight, but because we often find ourselves caught between tough situations. Unfortunately a lack of discernment often causes us to only see one issue among others. And often times this issue is not the main issue. This problem we’re faced with often seems like the biggest deal. The boar saw eleven wild dogs. Little did it know that its demise was going to be caused by one crocodile.

Many times what we think is the issue is not what derails us. It’s the issue we’re not even aware of. It’s the one lurking underneath the surface of the hype distracting us. It’s the unknown enemy, which suddenly snaps at the neck of our ignorance and takes us down. This is the devil’s strategy: distracting us with things that are prominent, yet, taking us out with something less visible but imminent.

As we address the myriad issues of life, like we should, let’s not get distracted with things that appear to grab the headlines and allow the enemy to creep up and cause us to end up with flat-lines: in our families, careers, marriages or relationships. Let’s pray for discernment and wisdom to see and address the real issue. I encourage you to trust God and not lean on your understanding of what you think you’re facing. God knows all. Trust Him to do this for you:

This time you will not have to leave in a hurry; you will not be trying to escape. The Lord your God will lead you and protect you on every side – Isaiah 58:12 GNT

Who Stole My Fruit?

Why are some relationships fruitful, while others are not? Why do some relationships work, and others don’t? The parable of the sower narrated by Jesus may give us a clue. I elaborated on this story in the video below, particularly as it relates to relationships. I encourage you to watch it. And as you do so, be open to receive whatever God is trying to convey to you. And feel free to share with others that you know can benefit from it.

Baffle of the Sexes

You’ve probably heard this before: men and women are different. Yes they are. In order for men and women to get along, especially in relationships, it’s in their best interest to understand and embrace their differences. Starting with the video below, I addressed some basic differences between men and women, and how we can use them to get along with each other.

How to Overcome Rejection in Relationships

Rejection can be heartbreaking. Nevertheless, you can overcome it. Being rejected does not necessarily mean something is wrong with you. It usually means something or someone is wrong for you. Furthermore, God uses rejection as a vehicle to help you find and fulfill your destiny. This destiny includes who you’re supposed to be with, where you’re supposed be, and what you’re supposed to do with your life.

I did a six-part video series on this subject. I encourage you to watch and share it with others who are dealing with being rejected from a relationship.

How God Uses Rejection to Help You Find and Fulfill Your Destiny